First, Rule Thyself

Regulation Can Set You Free

I’ve posted a number of social media videos - sometimes joking, sometimes not - about my goal of either founding or taking over a small town - with the goal of using government powers & funding for the benefit of the community.

Cities generally have the power to “regulate” - to tell people how they should do things - and that word has really stuck with me recently as I try to become find competency, credibility, & success in my life.

Regulation takes many forms - and many of the most important regulations are the ones we each put on ourselves. I certainly learned this the hard way.

Roughly what my nine weeks at Aspiro were like

When I was kidnapped & shipped off to a wilderness therapy program in Utah as a teenager, I learned a lot about “external regulation” - where choices were being made for me, because I hadn’t proven willing or able to make good ones for myself.

I didn’t get to choose to sleep in a bed in a house. I was made to slept on a mat & sleeping bag under a tarp I’d pitched. I didn’t get to choose to play video games. Instead, I was made to read a book about finding meaning in the holocaust.

It took a lot of demonstrated bad choices for me to get forced into such a situation.

Throwing what were basically big tantrums - as a 15-year old, mind you - had often helped me get my way at home. That didn’t really work as well in the middle of a desert, where nobody but program staff & my fellow campers could hear me scream.

I was no longer free to bully or demand or intimidate anyone, just because I was having a bad day. I had to learn how to deal with negative emotions in a healthier way.

Learning ways to reliably get a hold of myself & respond more calmly to difficult situations, instead of exploding in anger or collapsing into sadness has opened a lot of doors for me.

By learning to emotionally regulate my own temper, I became more suited to being an adult in a professional & social environment where the rule is “you’re not allowed to have emotional blow ups at people” - and that’s not to mention, I haven’t had to go to prison for impulsively committing some crime or another.

By setting & following certain standards, expectations, and rules for my own behavior, I can avoid or reduce being “punished” (socially, professionally, or legally) for the harmful or unpleasant things I might otherwise instinctively do.

I do have to take the initiative though - people will (quite reasonably) expect me to do, or at least attempt, all of the above without having to tell me.

The higher the standards I hold myself to, the more freedom and trust people and systems will grant me. My friends will let me borrow their car or join them at a party - because they know that I hold myself to a set of rules that will protect their interests.

Turns out, life is better when people trust you to do what you say & treat them right.

Perhaps one day - sooner or later - people around me will trust & respect me enough to regulate & govern a new city. Until then - and well after - my work will continue.

I hope you’re doing the same. Love you guys. Let’s go kick some ass this week.

Fritz